A friend is said to be one who helps you in need. However, those you regard as friends are not helpful on the spiritual path. For they themselves are in a spiritual slumber. The ways of the ego are such that you always want to befriend those who are inferior to you so you can nurture your high-handedness and feel honoured as superior. To make friends with the higher, you need to bend. And the ego does not like that.

Ego Enjoys Praises

Mulla Nasiruddin worked for a Nawab. Once at lunch, the Nawab said, ‘Today, lady-finger is tasting very good.’ Mulla quickly began to flatter, ‘There is nothing tastier than lady-finger. It is nectar, the king amongst plants! Like you to this town, lady-finger is to the vegetables!’ The cook overheard this conversation and started cooking lady-finger every day. Tired of lady-finger, the Nawab made a face on the seventh day. Sensing the Nawab’s mood, Mulla admonished the cook, ‘Do you intend to kill the Nawab by cooking such a terrible plant that even poor won’t eat?’ He even slapped the cook. Surprised by Mulla’s behaviour, the Nawab said, ‘As far as I remember, a week ago, you said that lady-finger is nectar and appreciated the cook, and today you say it’s terrible, and even hit him! I don’t quite understand this.’ Mulla said, ‘Sir! I am very clear. I am not working for lady- finger; I work for you. When you praised, I praised; and when you criticised, I criticised too. I am loyal to you, not to lady-finger!’ The Nawab was very pleased to hear this and rewarded Mulla.

Those with less wealth and a lower status than yours praise you. You like it very much because the ego finds satisfaction in being praised. Think! One who puts you into such spiritual slumber, is he your friend or a foe?

One who is free from the conditioning of ‘I’ and ‘my’ is truly awakened, and He alone can awaken you to your divine nature. Until you have the grace of a Guru, the process of awakening does not begin. Such a friend, a true benefactor can go to any extent and apply any tact to bring you to a state as His. But for this, you should be earnest and ready to act in accordance with His commands. The key to this is loving surrender.

Surrender with Love, Not Fear

Many people embrace religion out of fear – fear of death, difficulties, disease, or even fear of God. Weary of worldly fears, quarrels and disputes, they come to the Guru and follow His commands. But that does not bring about inner revolution.

However, love brings spiritual revolution. It’s through love that the disciple understands every move of the Guru and unconditionally obeys Him, like a servant to his master. Here servant does not mean slave. A slave is forcibly made to surrender and is threatened to obey the orders. Even though he bends his head, he never surrenders his heart.

When surrender is motivated by love, one consciously chooses to remain a humble servant of his Guru. His surrender arises out of absolute reverence and delight. He sees his ultimate good in following the Guru’s commands, and therefore submits to the Guru’s discipline with great zeal. There is no fear, lethargy, or doubt; he only experiences divine intoxication.

Unable to understand his spiritual euphoria, people may criticise and call him a fool or insane. But he remains unaffected by them. He knows that he has started to play the game of divine love. He belongs to the divine alone. He has no demands, no complaints. Unlike the one who wishes to obey his own will, this devout follower blossoms and earns a unique inner treasure by virtue of surrendering to the divine.

Those who surrender out of love and those who surrender out of fear may both practice devotion, austerities, study of scriptures, and follow Guru’s commands, yet, they are very different. The feelings and reasons behind the tears they shed are different. The former surrenders with his heart and soul, his complete existence, and experiences transformation. The latter sees no inner transformation as his ego remains rigid. His fear-driven surrender leads to contempt, aversion, rebelliousness, stress and suppression. The Guru appears to him like an enemy, not a friend.

Love Guru Immensely

Once you find a Guru, an enlightened Master, love Him immensely. A true disciple may die or be broken into pieces, but his love for the Guru does not ebb away. He remains unshaken by external adversities, and even when tried by the Guru. The Guru may put him through a thousand tests, yet his love for his Guru remains unaltered.

If this happens to you, soon an inner spiritual revolution will ensue. The delay is because of you, never because of the Guru. The more you defend your ego, the longer it will take. If you do not become an obstacle to yourself, the Guru can complete His work in no time. But in the anxiety and trying to defend your ego, if you hide your real inner state from the Guru, you are unnecessarily delaying your spiritual journey like a patient who delays his treatment by hiding his disease from the doctor.

Don’t Keep Distance

Open your heart completely to the Guru. With great difficulty, you have got the rare opportunity to have a living Guru in your life. Whatever you are, reveal yourself to Him. You have come to the divine physician to get yourself treated. Don’t take help of sophistry like lack of time, shyness, fear of losing public image, fear of punishment. Open up unconditionally to the Guru.

Serve the Guru out of joy and love, with immense veneration. For a disciple, the presence of the Guru is like a temple and serving the Guru is the practice of self-realisation. It is difficult to recognise the Self directly, because the Self cannot be seen. But Guru is the divine Self in a manifest form that can be grasped. Once Guru is known, realising the Self is not difficult.

Surrendering, bending, choosing to become a servant, desiring to offer everything, thinking that ‘I am nothing and the divine alone is’; when you do this in its entirety, that very moment, you are transported to another realm, and you get the first glimpse of the divine.

What is complete surrender? What will you surrender? What is yours that you will surrender! Guru says give me what is not yours and I shall give you what is already with you. What you regard as yours is only a delusion. Even that you wouldn’t leave?

Surrendering is not an external event. It is an inner revolution. When you become ready to give up everything, the phenomenon of awakening occurs. And when you are ready to give up, you realise there is nothing that can be given up; all is just a dream.

Guru is Everything

When Guru’s life becomes your life, in His breath, you breathe, in tune with His heart, your heart beats, in His music, your notes merge; if you can dissolve like this, you will attain a divine life.

If you live with the Guru, as if you are nothing, if Guru alone is everything for you, if His command is your life; then the Guru will talk through you, walk through you. When such oneness, such non-duality is accomplished, nothing else remains to be practiced.

Mere listening to the Guru will not bring transformation. You will need to surrender. In His presence, take a leap. The ocean is not far. You have reached the cliff. All you need is an adventure. Jump off the cliff. Once jumped, no one returns. Like the salt doll that jumps into the ocean and dissolves in it; you too must jump into the ocean of the divine, dissolve, disappear, and become nothing. To be nothing means to be everything. He who becomes nothing by surrendering to the Guru, becomes the whole by His grace.